Bringing up a youngster in today’s ultra-complex, ever-evolving world is problematic under the very best circumstances. However, when co-parents are attempting to raise their child amidst the painful emotions touched off by their split, it gets challenging.
Maybe the two of you just can’t agree about when your child should start dating or driving the family car. How will their college education be paid for when the time comes? Which of you will oversee the child’s spiritual training?
Ideally, you both will present a so-called “united front” for your child and back each other up. Unfortunately, though, when you bicker, wrangle and openly show antagonism toward each other, your child can get bewildered and even resentful. In that situation, no one emerges a winner.
Key choices you need to make as co-parents
What qualifies as a significant child-rearing choice can depend on many factors and vary a lot from family to family. One source defines it as “those [choices] that have a profound and lasting effect on the day-to-day lives of their children.” If you can narrow down the list of crucial choices regarding your child, then you have simplified the situation and made it somewhat more manageable.
Navigating choices successfully
There may be a tense truce between you, post-divorce. Still, there are ways to work around your differences. Remember to always put your child’s welfare front and center.
- Try to be flexible and open-minded. You may not like your ex, but there may be times when they have sound ideas about child-rearing.
- Don’t let a stalemate between you both stand in the way of your youngster’s education, social life or personal growth.
- A vigorous discussion about your child shouldn’t turn into a rancorous shouting match. Instead, focus on the matter at hand without getting too emotional.
When co-parents fail to make progress
Sometimes, two people who have recently been through the trauma of divorce can’t agree on issues affecting their child. When that happens, you might want somebody impartial to assist in smoothing your differences out for your child’s sake.